Critical Mass Thanksgiving Extravaganza! Week 4: A Christmas Story

I bet you thought that I’d forget about all of you on this wondrous, gluttonous day of gullet stuffing, didn’t you? That’s okay, I would have probably if it weren’t for exceptional time management skills and the fact that I celebrated the holiday last week. So…. WIN! You’ve read the title by now and I can guarantee that you fall into one of two categories: the person who groaned and asked, “Why,” to no one in particular, or the person who squeed with unrestrained joy, and adoration. That’s pretty much how it goes with Christmas Story. People either get super annoyed by it or super excited by it. Since I’m writing about movies for which I’m thankful, I’m obviously in the latter camp. I can, however, understand why people are annoyed by this movie. It came out in 1983 and pretty much just enjoyed a cult following for the next two decades. Then some brilliant tool at TBS figured that it would be a great idea to broadcast it for 24 straight hours on Thanksgiving Day in 2003. After that, Christmas Story’s popularity, and marketability, exploded meteorically. It was everywhere. There are leg lamps, bunny onesies, other apparel, ornaments, greeting cards, mugs, artwork, cookbooks… This movie gets nearly as much commercialized support as the holiday that it celebrates and that could certainly make people tired of seeing it. Fortunately, we appear to be going into a dormant phase so maybe the hype will die down enough for the haters to rediscover this movie in a way that will bring them joy. Without further adieu, here’s my review of A Christmas Story.

The movie opens on an idyllic town, and once the credits have rolled, we see a group of kids ogling the toy section of a department store front. Back in my day, you could find the must have items for the holiday season by taking a gander at the Toys R Us holiday catalog, but waaaaaay back when, if you wanted to see what the hot items were that year, you had to trudge down to your local department store and stare through a window. To be fair though, the displays were usually extremely ornate so it was more of an experience than I’m letting on, or at least I think it would have been. Anyway, it’s during this initial scene that we’re introduced to our protagonist, Ralphie Parker. Ralphie is a young man during the movie, but narrates the story as an adult. As all of Ralphie’s friends are going crazy over everything on display, he’s focused on only one item, the Red Ryder Carbine Action 200-shot Range Model air rifle with a compass in the stock and "this thing which tells time". The plot, simple though it may be, is established right that very moment. Ralphie wants that BB gun for Christmas and he’s willing to do whatever needs to be done in order to get it. To keep things somewhat brief, since the articles have gotten a little longer as of late, just let me note that every situation shown after this is related to that main plot in some way.

Ralphie spends the bulk of the rest of the film scheming and getting into shenanigans, like kids are wont to do. Some of the highlights include getting bullied, which culminates in Ralphie kicking the living crap out of that bully, watching as a friend gets his tongue stuck to a freezing cold metal pole, writing a short paragraph for his teacher about why he wants that BB gun, asking Santa Claus himself for said BB gun, which everyone tells him is a terrible idea since he’ll probably just hurt himself, engaging in a battle of wits as he tries to convince his mother that he should get the BB gun, and most memorably, using language that would have made most mothers blush during the time when this film was supposed to take place. In the end, despite the emotional ups and downs, Ralphie gets his BB gun, which he immediately hurts himself using. However, he’s able to make up a white lie to cover his bum, and everyone lives happily ever after.

I realize that that’s a really glossed over synopsis, but honestly, if you haven’t seen this movie by now, you really need to rectify that. It’s a simple and short synopsis because it’s a simple movie based around a simple premise. I think above everything else, that’s one of the reasons I love this movie! In a world that seems to demand more and more of me every passing day, there’s this unique time capsule treat that I get to partake in once per year that reminds me to slow things down and simplify. Coming in a close second to that is the presentation. The story is presented from a child’s point of view, as remembered by an adult. Because of that point of view, a lot of the excitement and wonder that a lot of children experience over the holiday season is well represented in an extremely unique way. What I mean is that there are a lot of other films that try to convey that sense of wonder that kids get during the holidays, but a large bulk of those movies revolve around some supernatural element. Because of that, the simple joys of the season tend to get lost. In Christmas Story, the simplicity of the premise makes for a stronger movie because we get to relive the joys that we, hopefully, got to experience when we were kids. For me, the holidays don’t officially start until I’ve had a chance to usher them in with this Christmas classic. It reminds me to cherish and hold on to that wonder that made the world a magical place when I was a child.

Beyond that, the humor throughout ranges from deadpan sarcasm to uproarious. I don’t think there’s a humorous note missed. The dialog runs anywhere from humdrum to downright poetic. The situations all tend to be enjoyable, and the warmth that this movie can generate really is a force to be reckoned with. The acting is pretty darn good, especially considering how many children were involved. The kid that play Randy Parker can be kind of annoying at times, but remember that this is being told from the perspective of adult Ralphie so that coloration of the memories is to be expected. I love that the narrative takes time to represent Ralphie’s day dreaming. It really does capture the spirit of what it means to be a kid. So why is this so beloved to me? This was really the first movie that was really ever mine. What I mean is I discovered this movie around Thanksgiving of 1996 in my 8th grade English class. We needed filler to get us through to the break and Christmas Story was that filler. I didn’t see this with friends, or family. It was something that I had stumbled across on my own that I could relish in by myself because I’m antisocial like that. It came at a time when a lot of what I had known as a child was dying around me, and when I was making that awkward transition into adulthood. It became a sort of emotional safe harbor for all of those immature tendencies that hadn’t quite resolved themselves yet, and it reminded me that it was okay to look at the world through the eyes of youth from time to time. I hope that everyone has a wonderful, and magical holiday season! Stay tuned to see what holiday classics we’ll be looking at during the month of December!